Once you've done it twice maybe three times, you don't want to reset the progress. Over time it gets easier (because you're making a habit) and because there's even more of a ritual involved.
You'd be undoing all the hard work you've done. You won't break it.
Just get 2-3 iterations of the rule under your belt..
This happened to me with my weight loss. I made a chain of it and did intermittent fasting for 9+ months with maybe one hiccup, but even on that hiccup day it was not a complete break, but just a bending of my rules (16 hours vs the normal 20, etc).
However, when Christmas came around, I started traveling and relaxed a lot more, feeling good about my progress from the months before.
It's not May and I'm just now hopping back on the train with the same intensity I had before. I usually got to 16+ hours, but my food choices were shit and I was overeating. Every time I ate when/what I wasn't supposed to though, I felt like an even bigger failure and used those emotions to justify my bad behavior.
It's been 1 week now since I've gone back to my more strict regimen and last night I really really really wanted to go out and get a burger around 1am. I managed to wait out the craving but it was insanely difficult and it's affected my work performance today.
All that to say, the chain is powerful in both directions. After you break it the first time, it's a lot easier to break again.
integrity issue IMO. you're OK with making commitments and not delivering on them.
controversial, perhaps, but fixing your integrity issues can go a long way. part of that means making commitments that matter, not role-playing about them.
most try to fix their integrity issues overnight by doing things like dieting, planning to go from 0 to insane exercise, or whatever else. that's tough, and probably won't work unless you've got the reserve capacity of someone who just took the cloth for like 12 months or something.
This is an excellent observation, thank you for the perspective. I realized that this is likely what I struggle with, and procrastination is rather a symptom of the issue. I find it very hard to make commitments to myself (and sometimes others) that I will follow through on. Once I am in a groove, I will continue, but starting is painful.
most helpful for me was making a "said i'd do it" category on my planning document. it has led me to:
- commit to doing things i put on the list - even if they suck
- lead me to promising to do a lot less things (generally good)
but, mostly i just wondered: do i want to see myself as someone who flakes? who says they'll do something and doesn't? does that reflect on my behavior in things that aren't so small? and decided that i needed to do better for myself.
Thanks for the insight! I definitely have some introspection to do on the topic, but I like the idea of the "Said I'd Do It" section for to-dos. Those tasks are inherently different than normal ones and I think the separation is a good training mechanism.
